Therapy Is A Cheat Code.

Therapy Is A Cheat Code.

“Brother I’m a careful, humble, reckless, arrogant, extravagant
N**ga probably battlin’ with manic depression
Man, I think I’m going mad again.
It’s like I’m happy for a second then I’m sad again
And to my fans, the reason I could get to this
You’re my drug, the instrumental my therapist

Dave – Psycho

 

I’ve been trying to write for a while. Every time I started, I found myself with a whole bunch of unfinished, disjointed thoughts that led nowhere. Maybe the subjects didn’t mean enough or maybe I was writing with no destination in mind. Whatever the reason, the last few months I’ve suffered severe writers block. I’ve just come from Washington DC back to Atlanta and in flight I’ve been listening to Dave’s excellent debut album “Psychodrama”. Mental Health is a recurrent theme throughout the album and tonight it’s my provided me with my muse. Tonight I want to talk about therapy.

In this crazy, always switched on reality that we live in, it’s no surprise that at times we get a little frayed at the edges. I know that I do and I am sure that many people reading this feel the same way. I mean, we are always switched on, from the moment we wake up to the minute we sleep, it’s non stop. We are in the Matrix 24-7 and there is no Neo in sight.

There are so many ways to fall off of life’s conveyor belt, and  sometimes it feels like when you’re waiting for luggage at the airport and the conveyor belt gets so full that suitcases start to fall off at the bends and curves.. Man, we spend many days trying not to fall off.

There are so many social catalysts and constructs that can lead to our unravelling. For some it’s constant exposure to the pressures and expectations of family and society. For others, it’s the failure to deal with the trauma of the our past. Whatever it is, we can no longer, as a society, afford to ignore it.

Mental Health is a taboo subject amongst many black people, not just in Africa, but globally, we just don’t talk about it until it strikes at the very core of our circle, until then, it’s not “our” problem … but it is.

We need to talk and I don’t mean the typical surface level conversations that we have with each other. We need to talk. No matter how strong you perceive people in your life to be, we need to talk. The strong die too, the strong go through it as well. The people who provide you with support, who is supporting them? Black men especially, we need to talk.

I’m on vacation, trying to regain my own balance. The last few months have been mentally challenging for me and I give thanks for my own support system. I am blessed with a few people that can help me get back to the light when it gets dark. Not everyone has that luxury.

Therapy may seem like something that “other” people do and in Africa, we need to expand access to therapists and psychologists. We also need to break the stigma attached to consulting them. Peer counselling can be a useful tool and I am super happy to see more and more young people getting involved in creating support networks for each other. There is a long way to go, but we are making babysteps.

In the meanwhile, be open to providing support to friends who may be “going through it”. Also, don’t be afraid to ask for help if you need it, you’ll be surprised how many people are willing to share the little light they have, this can literally be a life saving and a life changing decision.

I don’t have all the answers, I guess to some extent I’m still searching myself, but I do know that suffering in silence ain’t the one.

Your mind is the garden of your soul and from time to time, even in the best kept garden, the odd weed will take root. When this happens, if we need help to root them out, let’s not be afraid to ask for it.

Love and light.